“It was always the potential of (marriage) … I think it was just another thing to keep me on the hook.” “He would occasionally take me into a jewellery store and get me to try rings on, but he never actually proposed, he never actually asked me to marry him,” Bonnie said. I was always able to check.”īonnie moved into his house and even began looking at IVF, a process James “was invested” in. “He was always around when he said he was around, so if a flight was delayed he would not come back early. “He was really good at lining up when the flights came, he knew to check flight’s schedules and stuff like that,” Bonnie said. While James would usually spend two weeks on, two weeks off with Bonnie for what he said was work – and would sometimes have to leave suddenly for jobs – she was never suspicious. “Certainly in those early years I was happy more than I was not happy,” she said. “I don’t know if he was trying to test me, I don’t know if he was trying to see if I was loyal to him … I don’t know why he told me that at that time when of course he was still seeing her.”īonnie and James moved past the infidelity and over the next few years did all the normal things couple do. I don’t know why he wanted me to know that,” she said.
“That caused quite a bit of conflict in the relationship at the time, and to this day I still don’t know why he told me that. It was the ex James had been with when they first met, and Bonnie had believed the two had split before she and him started dating.īonnie was devastated, but also felt she was “invested” and “wanted this relationship to work”, so they stayed together through what she thought was a one-time “slip”.
However nine months in, James revealed he had slept with his ex six months prior. “He’d left flowers on my doorstep and take me out … he’d make effort to come and pick me up from uni and take me out to dinner, lots of phone calls and chats online.” “It was lovely, nobody had ever done that to me before,” she told. He showered her with love and attention, he was nothing like her past boyfriends, who had all been “broke” or uni students like Bonnie. Not only had James being seeing this woman but he also had built a life with her that was unsettlingly similar to the one he had with Bonnie.īonnie opened up about the relationship on SBS’ Insight in an interview set to air tonight, revealing how the affair had left her emotionally scarred and diagnosed with PTSD.īonnie, now 42, began dating James when she was 25 after the pair met through mutual friends and got on “like a house on fire”. “Then the person went away and he got up and said, ‘I think I know who it is, I’m going to go and sort this out’, and he left.”īut that wasn’t the end of things, with Bonnie later discovering the woman at the door had been James’ other partner – a woman he had dated the entirety of their eight year relationship as well as the seven years prior. “And he looked at me and I said, ‘I’m not opening the door unless it’s the police or my mother.’ “I remember saying to him, ‘who is that?’,” the Perth woman told. Sure, during their eight years together James* would always spend weeks away from her as he had to travel for work, a situation that Bonnie accepted even if she missed him terribly.īut in 2011 things came to a screeching halt when she and James were woken in the middle of the night by a knock on the door of the home they shared together. For years, Bonnie Mitchell’s relationship had seemed blissfully “normal”.
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